Misplaced Motives

The other day, I had several errands to run in as little time as possible. Sitting in my car before turning the key, I breathed a quick prayer that I would glorify God in my imminent, busy, scurrying around... because I know it's so easy to get caught up in doing my own little thing that I become easily irritated and impatient, or become blinded to opportunities God may provide (whether to share the Gospel or show kindness) because of my obstinate focus on my plan. But after breathing that momentary "please, God" I had to stop (or stay stopped): was I really desiring God's glory above (instead of) my own, or did I just want my day to go smoothly and quickly? Did I want God to bless me and my errands because I could somehow impress Him with my humility, or persuade Him to accommodate my desires under the guise of serving Him? OUCH! I think it was a case of knowing the right thing (prayerfully committing tasks to God) and trying to do it, but doing it in the flesh. I'm grateful for the eyes God gave me to see an aspect of sinful thinking I struggle with mightily: performance-based living.

You are who God thinks you are, not who you present yourself to be. (Gunner)

God's love for us results not from our goodness, our proficiency, or our accomplishments. We can't earn His approval by what we do or who we masquerade ourselves to be. God's love originates in God, put plainly. It's His prerogative to do what He will, and I'm glad He did choose to love, adopt, redeem, forgive, and bless us... so why do I sometimes live like my standing is not secure? Can I so easily gloss over Christ's accomplishment-- obedience to His Father, sacrificial propitiation, atonement, victory over sin-- which makes my new life possible? That's the only reason I am declared righteous before God: Christ's perfect, substitutionary blood.

It's a good news, bad news scenario (but mostly good). Bad news: you can't do anything to make God love you or accept you. Good news: He has chosen to do so anyway through Christ! It is very freeing to realize this, especially when we can rest in that security of our identity in Christ instead of fruitlessly striving toward the impossible goal of being "good enough."

Your worst days are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God's grace. And your best days are never so good that you are beyond the need of God's grace. (Jerry Bridges)

Jerry Bridges's book, The Discipline of Holiness, is quite beneficial on this subject. He explains it more eloquently than I could! In all this "you can't do ANYTHING to earn God's approval," the pendulum swing argument is, "well, why are we supposed to try and be holy then, and why are there so many commands in the Bible about our behavior?" I guess it comes down to the motivation behind the action: am I obedient because I am trying to appease God, in my twisted understanding of reality? (ouch) Or, am I obedient because I love Him? I hope it's the latter.